With Father’s Day just around the corner, it got me thinking…
Father’s Day is more than a celebration of fathers. It is a time to recognize and honor the grandfathers, mentors, uncles, brothers, nephews, sons, coaches, teachers, and countless role models who have invested their time, energy, wisdom, and love into the lives of others.
It’s also an opportunity to pause and reflect specifically on the men who have helped shape our journeys. Some taught us through their encouragement, guidance, and unwavering support. Others taught us through life's challenges, demonstrating resilience, perseverance, and strength in the face of adversity. Still others influenced us simply by being present—showing up day after day, leading by example, and reminding us that consistency matters.
The lessons they shared may not have always come in the form of words. Often, they were found in their actions, choices, and the way they treated others. Their impact lives on in the values we carry, the decisions we make, and the people we strive to become.
This Father's Day, may we celebrate not only those who have led us, but also the leadership qualities they inspired within us. Their influence is a reminder that one life can make a lasting difference in another—and that may be one of the greatest lessons of all.
When we think about leadership, we often think about accomplishments. Yet one of the most meaningful things Dads and leaders do is often found in the lives they influence and people they develop.
People may hear our words, but they experience our character.
Many fathers including my dad understand this principle well. Children learn more from what they observe than they are told. The same is true in organizations. Teams watch leaders closely. They notice how leaders respond to pressure, navigate conflict, celebrate success, and handle mistakes.
My dad has been gone 35 years; the lessons he taught me have helped shape the leader and person I am today. He left this earth on his 68th birthday. I think of him every day and wish he could have stayed a little longer so he could have met Doug and Noah and share with him how much I appreciated what I learned from him about life and leadership.
Ten lessons I learned from him remain with me and shape who I am today. I believe they are worth sharing and serve as a great reminder that as leaders we need remember the old cliché “actions speak louder than words” still rings true today.
Accountability – take responsibility for your actions, even when or maybe especially when you make a mistake. People don’t expect perfection. Everyone makes mistakes. People respect those who take responsibility for their actions and if you make a mistake, own it, fix it, and figure out how to prevent it from happening again.
Civility – treat people with respect. Treat others the way you would like to be treated, even in stressful situations.
Courage – stand up for what you believe in, while respecting that others may have different beliefs. You don’t have to agree with them, but respect that people have a right to their opinions.
Determination – Keep persevering towards a goal despite obstacles especially when it’s hard.
Encouragement Creates Confidence - Encourage growth, celebrate progress, and help others believe they are capable of more than they ever thought possible.
Experience - Take advantage of opportunities. Create environments where learning can occur and where people are not punished for mistakes but encouraged to learn from them. Personally, I have learned more from my mistakes than I learned from a book or a lecture.
Integrity – It’s not just about doing things right. It’s about doing the right thing – even when it’s hard. In other words - Would your mom and I be proud of the decision you made if it were printed on the front page of the paper? (hopefully both my parents would be proud today if my life decisions (well most of them)) were in print.
Presence – One of the greatest gifts a father and leader can offer is simply being present and encouraging others to be present, really present, not just sitting there scrolling(though scrolling wasn’t thing when my dad was alive) but actively engaging with your family or team.
Trustworthy – Trust is built over time through consistent actions. Fathers and leaders alike earn credibility when their actions align with their words. In other words, follow-through. Do what you say you will do. And then do it again. Team members trust leaders who follow through.
Work Ethic – Work hard first then earn the reward. Don’t expect to just get something then do the work
Here are two stories about my dad: one about accountability and the other about being present as well as thinking of others.
Being present and thinking of others.
My dad was captain of police and worked different shifts in addition to owning his own business. He was there as much as possible while working two and three jobs in the beginning. To be fair, he grew up during the depression and didn’t have much. He wanted to provide more for his family than he had early in life.
I remember one Christmas my dad noticed how much time my mom spent in the kitchen preparing our annual holiday meal. It was the same way at Thanksgiving. She was in the kitchen more than with all of us. He felt she was missing most of the day after gifts were opened. From that year on, we switched our Christmas meal to a much simpler meal – one with deli sandwiches, ribbon Jello (which I still make each year), chips and dip, and of course a wide variety of Christmas cookies (which my sister and I also still make to this day). And for breakfast on Christmas and Easter, my sisters and I got to eat candy for breakfast! How’s that for a cool tradition? By the way, my family enjoys this tradition to this day and spends a great deal of time together on each holiday!
Leaders need to make time to spend with team members and support them in their development. Besides, if you want people to successfully lead the organization when you’re gone it’s a leader’s responsibility to help them learn and lead as much as possible.
Accountability
One time when my dad was a cop, he caught kids vandalizing a school. Sadly, many times parents just paid for the damage. This time my dad told the kids and the parents he wanted the kids at the police station for the next three Saturdays from something like 8 -3. So, for the following three Saturdays, the kids cleaned police cars, toilets, and did other odd jobs around the police station. They weren’t happy but they were held accountable. Years later, one of the kids walked into my dad’s business and shared, that while he hated my dad at the time, he said, “Thank you. You were the only one who held me accountable for my actions and if it weren’t for you, I’d probably be in jail right now.”
I love this example of holding someone accountable and how it can positively impact their decisions moving forward. Truth be told, I think he was also making the point that if he ever caught us doing something we shouldn’t be doing what a possible consequence would be. The good news is we knew if we did something wrong, we would be held accountable.
Leadership is not just about titles, responsibilities, or authority. It’s an extension of character. It is the visible expression of our values, beliefs, habits, and priorities. I believe my dad displayed his beliefs through his actions. They’re often a reflection of the person behind the position.
I encourage you to take a moment and ask yourself some or all of the following questions:
What reflection do I see in the mirror?
What qualities define me?
What values guide my decisions?
What example am I setting for those around me?
How do my actions align with my intentions?
The answers may have less to do with what you accomplish and more to do with how you show up and the people you impact along the way. Because in leadership, who you are will always influence how you lead.
This Father's Day, take a moment to thank those who have influenced your journey and
helped shape who you are today and who you want to become. Consider the lessons they
taught you, intentionally or unintentionally. Let them know they have made a difference in
your life.
Now go do something fun with those you love and with your team members.
You Got This. And I Have Your Back.
Ann
